Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Dear Spammers

"Well done webmaster.  Keep up good work.  I will come back here soon."

I'm sure you will!  I see the evidence every day in my spam folder.  Since I so rudely delete all your efforts to get my attention, here is my response to you.

Dear Spammers,
Image Source: Kachina Daze

Thank you for caring about my health and beauty.  I appreciate you turning me on to sunscreens, lip gloss, and some questionable anti-aging substances that promise to transform me back to my youth.  Which has what to do with "The Value of Comments"?

And what woman wouldn't want some cheap Prada?  Interestingly left on "Don't Let Your Bundle of Joy Cost a Bundle"  Appropriate don't you think?

Thanks also for bombarding me with male-specific drugs and products, just in case I am planning on a secret gender-changing procedure.  This was left on one of my rewritten nursery rhymes "This Little Piggy".  Makes me wonder who the little piggy has been talking to.

To help me pay for all these wonderful products and services, you offer me a special "payday loan".  True poetry to my ears left on "Shades of Summer".  

So thank you for sharing, and for staying on topic. Until next time...


Roses to Rainbows


  1. Lol, Linda. Yes, who was the little piggy talking to? Some wolf! ;)

    Thank you for such an entertaining post this morning. It's one I can certainly relate to.

  2. Clever...linking some posts to spammers since they love to link to bloggers:~)

    Are you rested yet? I still can't believe you managed that 30-2 challenge. I'd be taking a blogging break and putting ice on my fingers if I did that.

    Happy day to you, my friend. Pet the kitties for me:~)

  3. Davina- Hi! I'm glad I could add a little levity to your morning. The spam can provide some entertainment value, in spite of its annoyance.

    Sara- Thanks! I was pleased with the opportunity to link to some old posts. As for being rested, I guess so. Sometimes it is easier to write with prompts, even the difficult ones, than dig up something out of thin air.

  4. Ha.. too funny. Yes there's a crazy amount of junk comments. I'm just glad that Blogger catches most of them in the spam folder. I just turned off Anonymous comments again because too many of those were slipping through.

  5. Hilary- I'm glad they are caught too. I would be embarrassed if some of them were actually posted.

    I thought I'd look through the spam folder for some fodder before cleaning it out.

  6. LOL Linda! Very clever! So sorry to hear you have been bombarded by spammers. Hope your day is wonderful.

  7. What always makes me chuckle is that those that I receive are mostly geared to the US and I'm in the UK. These spammers don't do their homework ;)

  8. That is funny...and clever. I get tons of spam as well. I don't get the point of it. Surely people don't respond to this garbage.

  9. Hi Linda .. one or two creep onto the blog - but I keep a wary eye out and they get deleted quickly ...

    They are pains ... and spam in my mail also big pains ... thankfully it's not too terrible - but I'd hate for something to happen ..

    Fun post .. cheers Hilary

  10. Like Babs, I always find it funny that my spammers are geared for the US... like offering me health coverage when Canada has universal health care. And of course, like you, I haven't had any "reconstructive" surgeries yet... :-)

  11. I've been meaning to do a similar post for ages, but I've been too lazy about it. You beat me to it, Linda, and you pulled it off splendidly. Funny stuff.

  12. Bahahahhahahahahahahah!

    Crazy spammers!

  13. I loved this Linda! Clever back at you! I wonder what comments they will leave you now.... funny how I get all my spam on Royalty under the Just Because I Love You article. Maybe they think I'm a softy because of the title. They write weird sentences too. Do you think they are from another country?

  14. Linda- Welcome to Roses to Rainbows. The spammers do provide blog content.

    Babs- I'm not sure what that says about us. Some of my spam does contain foreign language, sometimes in a completely different "alphabet".

    Cheryl- I can't imagine that anyone would click on those links - even out of curiousity. Good way to get a virus.

    Hilary- Fortunately Blogger's spam filter catches them so they don't make it onto the blog. Occasionally there is one really normal looking one that gets through, but I delete it.

    Nicky- I think they are all equal opportunity spammers.

    KZ- Thank you! They gave me some good material to work with. Glad to see you survived the challenge.

    Meleah- Crazy, funny, annoying, but fortunately filtered.

    Ashley- I'm glad you liked this. I'm not sure how they choose what they do, but the spam usually comes on the older posts. The spam filter catches most of it, plus no comment on a post over 7 days old gets published without me seeing it first. I get nonsense sentences and foreign characters, too. I think spammers come from all over. As you see from the comments above, folks in Canada and the UK get spam directed to the US. Who knows...


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